Never ever in my life have I walked the streets on Mischief Eve without cautious steps. For 28 years, this has always been the night of my keenest awareness to the shadows that dart between parked cars and into alleys. I always walk on the well lit streets and with the crowds on this night. I have been hit by many an egg in my days. They leave a bruise on your skin and a nasty mess on your clothes. I adopted this attitude of vigilence as I left work tonight. Then i reallized, Halloween only exists in the English Bushibans in Taiwan and even there it is not really understood. I never took much care in dressing up. I never had much delight in the little ones begging for candy. Apprehension and anxiety are more lasting impressions than the sweets I got in own youthful trick or treating experiences. But all that said, being here makes me realize that it is my favorite holliday.
Teacher April asked me what adults do on Halloween. I told her that people host parties at their homes. People dress up and go party to party saving the best one for last. That children stop going door to door around the age of 12 or 13. Children have parties of their own. I told her about bobbing for apples. "But that's so dangerous!"
I said "you are Taiwanese! you put your children, babies sometimes on the back of a scooter with no saftey harness, sometimes with no seat, then you swerve in and out of traffic, in the same lane as on coming traffic, between trucks and busses, heedless of traffic lights, lanes or speedlimits, and you think bobbing for apples is dangerous?!?"
Friday, October 30, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Sunday again.
Sunday
I asked the woman who runs the hostel, “How do you say “refrigerator”?” bingxiang. Then I checked out.
I moved into my place. Ashley came to sanxia with me to help me lug my bags. I have two bags. We dropped the bags off and went to do some sightseeing. While we were in the belltower of the temple (which deserves a page devoted to it entirely) Teacher Fantasy called to see how I was getting on. I told her “wo yao ge bing xiang, mei you ge bingxiang” She didn’t understand me. I told her there was no fridge and no internet cable. She hung up. She called me back 5 minutes later and told me to rush to the apt. I left Ashley on “Old Minsheng st” to look at the shops. As I got to the apartment there were two small women, one of them my landlord, moving a refrigerator into my room. I “told” (lots of pointing, at the computer, at the socket in the wall, at heaven that gave us the internet…) that I needed a wire. They pilfered one from and empty neighboring apartment. I thanked them.
The room is small but has potential. I get lots of sun light in the morning through my window. If I stand on tiptoes I can see out of my window. I climbed the stairwell till it stopped ascending and found myself at the door of the roof. I went out. 8 stories high is sufficient for a fantastic view of the mountains and the town surrounding me.
Yonghe (in Taipei) , Ashley works in this neighborhood and had noticed a night market there. We have learned that no two nightmarkets are alike. Yonghe is very working class. Not many tourists around. The streets were wide. The people were friendly rather than frenzied. Like patient fishermen the street merchants wait till their bait is nibbled before they start reeling. I prefer this strategy to the herding and shouting of Shillin nightmarket. I don’t like feeling like a cow.
The food was good here too. Got some roti, a dosa and it sort of actually tasted Indian. (I had a masala in the train station food court. they gave chopsticks and noodles) There were many Vietnamese, Thai, Korean and Indonesian vendors here. This must be a neighborhood where all the foreign workers live. I was further convinced of this by the store I found attatched to the market. A glorified dollarstore. They sold everything. Electronics (speakers for $6US, food, stationary, clothes, bedding, dvd, music, cleaning supplies, hairdye, sextoys, liquor, deodorant, cookies, a hair care product that said ‘for hornie care’ (maybe it should have been in another aisle).
At this shop I bought two buckets, a broom, some hangers, chopsticks, Lysol, Mr. Muscle bathroom cleanser, handsoap with the Virgin Mary on it, rags and hand towels-total-$15US. I couldn’t get all I wanted, like a mug, a bowl, a spoon etc… because I’m budgeting until payday.
Ashley’s work is closer to where I live and easier to get to from here than it is from the hostel. She has Ingrid looking for a place for her right now. She has left the hostel and will stay with me until she finds a place of her own. My room is small but it will do.
We take turns using the desk.
We have one set of keys and one cellphone. I have not put any money on the cell phone card. I’ve been meaning to call Megan since Sunday. I don’t call in the day time because I am not sure if she is working in the field and away from Ms.Lin or not. I work until 9 at night and then I convince myself it is too late to call. Tomorrow I will call after work. I hope that is not too late. Do tea farmers go to bed early?
I want to know when she is coming back from the farm. I will miss her when she goes and her departure from the island is fast approaching.
Ashley told Ingrid that she enjoys hiking. Ingrid's daughter is Ashley's age and an avid hiker. They are hiking this Saturday at dawn. Ashley will spend the night at Ingrid's on Friday since neither the metro nor the
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Saturday, October 24, 2009
cleaned the hallway
This is weird. I am checking out of the hostel now. Today someone cleaned the hallway and the roach carcase is gone.
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Friday, October 23, 2009
apartement
Megan's post made me green tea with envy. hahaha. I am so funny.
Before tonight's posting I must issue this disclaimer:
None of the events, people or places in this blog are real. This is entirely a work of fiction. If you are law enforcement reading this, please note, the author is a fat man in Iowa.
Understand? Good.
Ok.
English teaching so shady! We evacuated the children today, took all of their pictures off the wall, rolled the files (the filing cabinet is on heavy rubber wheels, like a Jeep) through the bathroom, out a window and into the alley. We aren't supposed to have children in this building until December. I told my friend this. He said that one time at his school, the took the kids onto the neighboring building's roof and conducted class. The police inspectors came up to the roof but since they didn't have a permit to search the other building they couldn't do anything about it, even though they could see the class. At least my school pays the police for the courtesy of a warning call.
Oh, and working before you have a work permit it a strict "no, no".
Good thing I'm here as a student and not as an illegal worker. At least that is what Fantasy told my new landlady when she asked.
Yesterday, I saddled up on the back of Fantasy's scooter. We drove to the realestate office. I sat at a table with two middle aged women (real estate agent and landlord). An office girl served us yellow tea. No one else drank theirs so I didn't either. Fantasy sat with me. She talked a lot. I don't really know what was said. I answered them in Chinese when they asked my name, age and country of origin (that's all I know; well i can also order coffee and bubble tea and beef noodles). Soon everyone pulled out little wooden stamps. Rectangular pieces of wood, 1cm x 1cm x 4 cm. They put their stamps on a green colored document. Since I didn't have a stamp I had to dip my thumb in the red ink and press it on the paper next to my signature.
Now I have an apartment. It is 1cm x 1cm x 4cm. Well, actually it is 10 ping. A ping is just smaller in size than a twin bed. This includes the bathroom. So really my apt. is 8 ping.There is a bed, a desk, a tv and a refridgerator.
I am in the heart of Sanxia which is good. My apt number is 9, which is a very lucky chinese number.
My new address is
Taipei County
Sanshia Township
#264 Wenhua Road (actually, I don't know how to spell it because there is no English on the roadsign.)
6floor, Room 9
TaiwanR.O.C.
I asked what the postal code was but no one understood me. I will find out soon.
I move in on Sunday.
After signing the papers all 4 of us went outside, me, Fantasy, Ms.Lin the realtor, and Ms. Jayne the landlady. Fantasy handed me her spare pink helmet. Ms. Lin got on her scooter. Ms. J got on the back of Ms. Lin's scooter. Fantasy got on her scooter. I got on the back. Off we went to the new apartment so I could learn how to use the keys etc...
Then I went to work.
I told my kids they shouldn't start a sentence with the word "Because".
They said "Why not?"
I said, "Because I said so."
Ashley was late coming home tonight. It was after midnight. Ingrid wanted to have a talk with her about the business. "stay in control of this kids. teach them. bla bla bla."
The kids in my class say "bra bra bra" in lieu of "bla bla bla". I have even heard the foreign teachers use "bra bra bra". It sounds strange to me.
I have work in the early morn.
It is time for bed.
Before tonight's posting I must issue this disclaimer:
None of the events, people or places in this blog are real. This is entirely a work of fiction. If you are law enforcement reading this, please note, the author is a fat man in Iowa.
Understand? Good.
Ok.
English teaching so shady! We evacuated the children today, took all of their pictures off the wall, rolled the files (the filing cabinet is on heavy rubber wheels, like a Jeep) through the bathroom, out a window and into the alley. We aren't supposed to have children in this building until December. I told my friend this. He said that one time at his school, the took the kids onto the neighboring building's roof and conducted class. The police inspectors came up to the roof but since they didn't have a permit to search the other building they couldn't do anything about it, even though they could see the class. At least my school pays the police for the courtesy of a warning call.
Oh, and working before you have a work permit it a strict "no, no".
Good thing I'm here as a student and not as an illegal worker. At least that is what Fantasy told my new landlady when she asked.
Yesterday, I saddled up on the back of Fantasy's scooter. We drove to the realestate office. I sat at a table with two middle aged women (real estate agent and landlord). An office girl served us yellow tea. No one else drank theirs so I didn't either. Fantasy sat with me. She talked a lot. I don't really know what was said. I answered them in Chinese when they asked my name, age and country of origin (that's all I know; well i can also order coffee and bubble tea and beef noodles). Soon everyone pulled out little wooden stamps. Rectangular pieces of wood, 1cm x 1cm x 4 cm. They put their stamps on a green colored document. Since I didn't have a stamp I had to dip my thumb in the red ink and press it on the paper next to my signature.
Now I have an apartment. It is 1cm x 1cm x 4cm. Well, actually it is 10 ping. A ping is just smaller in size than a twin bed. This includes the bathroom. So really my apt. is 8 ping.There is a bed, a desk, a tv and a refridgerator.
I am in the heart of Sanxia which is good. My apt number is 9, which is a very lucky chinese number.
My new address is
Taipei County
Sanshia Township
#264 Wenhua Road (actually, I don't know how to spell it because there is no English on the roadsign.)
6floor, Room 9
TaiwanR.O.C.
I asked what the postal code was but no one understood me. I will find out soon.
I move in on Sunday.
After signing the papers all 4 of us went outside, me, Fantasy, Ms.Lin the realtor, and Ms. Jayne the landlady. Fantasy handed me her spare pink helmet. Ms. Lin got on her scooter. Ms. J got on the back of Ms. Lin's scooter. Fantasy got on her scooter. I got on the back. Off we went to the new apartment so I could learn how to use the keys etc...
Then I went to work.
I told my kids they shouldn't start a sentence with the word "Because".
They said "Why not?"
I said, "Because I said so."
Ashley was late coming home tonight. It was after midnight. Ingrid wanted to have a talk with her about the business. "stay in control of this kids. teach them. bla bla bla."
The kids in my class say "bra bra bra" in lieu of "bla bla bla". I have even heard the foreign teachers use "bra bra bra". It sounds strange to me.
I have work in the early morn.
It is time for bed.
a little place called deep mountain
in lue of a wooden cart pulled by two sturdy white oxen, i was picked up at Ershuei station in a sexy black toyota jeep by two of the friendliest faces, both beaming adorably with their dimples and shining black eyes. Uting was at the wheel. a sassy little minx with layered hair and a small build, english impecable (as she says she likes the whities), and quick with the punch. Lin, sitting in the back with two little girls (ueew who we call dinosaur because she eats everything and maeko who's smile can make you melt), warmed my heart with her light humor and side grin, her friendly energy has a sarcasm that matches my own, where teasing is endless and friends and family are mutual. they took me first for my first taiwanese hot pot for dinner... made me eat pigs blood (snickering to each other)... my tongue is still healing. we drove to their house, shared by their grandma, mother chang, father chang, brother Lon Lon, brother's wife Ping Ping, and Lin (Uting lives and works about an hour away and only comes home on the weekends). the family was hesitant and i was tired, so our visit was brief as we would leave for deep mountain early the next morning.
Uting prepared me for a very long mountain trek. she said we would be walking for hours and that i would not return until late night. i would be very very tired, and would work very very hard. ... i was picked up in the jeep and the ride only took around 20 min. it was beautiful, breath taking really, wheeling our way up and around the mountain, with green haze in the distance and tea fields teiring up all around. their factory is called deep mountain and it is nestled in a small valley with the most dreamlike scene surrounding... clean rows of tea funneling up, whispy trees shooting out here and there, moutain fog slowly drifting. in front of the factory warehouse, four tarps were laid out with tea leaves scattered evenly about. our work, for most of the day, was to take a corner of the tarp, one person on each end, and roll the tea leaves to the center. then we would proceed to scatter the leaves evenly on the tarp again. Lin told me that this was the first step, after picking, as it softens the leaves and breaks down enzymes. we would do this about two times per tarp... there were two additional loads of tea leaves that came that day from two different farmers. then we would take the tarps inside and scatter them out on massive machine trays. repeat the same process on these trays about every 30 minutes or so. there was a sturdy woman, whom i am told to call auntie, who was quite the pro and hardcore taiwanese who scattered the leaves like a robot. there were also three factory workers... one whom Lin calls fatty who is head hancho... who chew beattle nut all day and are in charge of rolling, frying, and baking the tea. i will learn more about this process tomorrow. most of the day was spent scattering leaves intermittantly with snacking on boiled peanuts, chocolate, baked goods, and lunch involved goose, porks, bamboo soup, fish... you name it... it was delicious. Lin also took me to visit the neighbors bee farm. by this point the fog had settled dense and all i could make out were two headlights under a netted tarp, and the sound of bzzzz all around. auntie (i'm supposed to call all the women auntie) and her husband (whose name means handsome in english) taught me about something called royal jelly as they picked baby bee embryos from honey comb with a small ivory toothpick. Lin walked me through a lane lined with white boxes and the humm of bees could be heard everywhich way. it was the dreamiest scene i have ever been in. we left around 8pm. it was dark... the mountain deep.
i am staying at their 'aunties' house. it is huge with several empty bedrooms, a couple of flat screen tv's, house slippers, and a two headed shower... yep... two!! this week has been amazing and i am beyond thankful to the kindness that they have shown me. the food is amazing and always resembling a small feast. the work is mostly weeding in Lon Lon's two year old tea farm right behind the house i am staying, with my new boyfriend Yan Yan (black and white and smells... well of goat) neighing in the distance. Lin taught me caligraphy, as well as to ride on her scooter. i learned that taiwanese start counting their age from conception and that fortune tellers set the date of engagements and weddings. Lin is getting married soon, and i got to meet her to-be husband (whose name in english is sausage... and that's what we call him) as well as their 'match-maker.' Lon Lon is an amazing artist but has chosen to be a farmer. today Ping Ping taught me to make soap! tea tea tea, snacks, and bicycling. it is all a hazy crazy wonderful whirlwind right now... and it all started with a little place called deep mountain.
Uting prepared me for a very long mountain trek. she said we would be walking for hours and that i would not return until late night. i would be very very tired, and would work very very hard. ... i was picked up in the jeep and the ride only took around 20 min. it was beautiful, breath taking really, wheeling our way up and around the mountain, with green haze in the distance and tea fields teiring up all around. their factory is called deep mountain and it is nestled in a small valley with the most dreamlike scene surrounding... clean rows of tea funneling up, whispy trees shooting out here and there, moutain fog slowly drifting. in front of the factory warehouse, four tarps were laid out with tea leaves scattered evenly about. our work, for most of the day, was to take a corner of the tarp, one person on each end, and roll the tea leaves to the center. then we would proceed to scatter the leaves evenly on the tarp again. Lin told me that this was the first step, after picking, as it softens the leaves and breaks down enzymes. we would do this about two times per tarp... there were two additional loads of tea leaves that came that day from two different farmers. then we would take the tarps inside and scatter them out on massive machine trays. repeat the same process on these trays about every 30 minutes or so. there was a sturdy woman, whom i am told to call auntie, who was quite the pro and hardcore taiwanese who scattered the leaves like a robot. there were also three factory workers... one whom Lin calls fatty who is head hancho... who chew beattle nut all day and are in charge of rolling, frying, and baking the tea. i will learn more about this process tomorrow. most of the day was spent scattering leaves intermittantly with snacking on boiled peanuts, chocolate, baked goods, and lunch involved goose, porks, bamboo soup, fish... you name it... it was delicious. Lin also took me to visit the neighbors bee farm. by this point the fog had settled dense and all i could make out were two headlights under a netted tarp, and the sound of bzzzz all around. auntie (i'm supposed to call all the women auntie) and her husband (whose name means handsome in english) taught me about something called royal jelly as they picked baby bee embryos from honey comb with a small ivory toothpick. Lin walked me through a lane lined with white boxes and the humm of bees could be heard everywhich way. it was the dreamiest scene i have ever been in. we left around 8pm. it was dark... the mountain deep.
i am staying at their 'aunties' house. it is huge with several empty bedrooms, a couple of flat screen tv's, house slippers, and a two headed shower... yep... two!! this week has been amazing and i am beyond thankful to the kindness that they have shown me. the food is amazing and always resembling a small feast. the work is mostly weeding in Lon Lon's two year old tea farm right behind the house i am staying, with my new boyfriend Yan Yan (black and white and smells... well of goat) neighing in the distance. Lin taught me caligraphy, as well as to ride on her scooter. i learned that taiwanese start counting their age from conception and that fortune tellers set the date of engagements and weddings. Lin is getting married soon, and i got to meet her to-be husband (whose name in english is sausage... and that's what we call him) as well as their 'match-maker.' Lon Lon is an amazing artist but has chosen to be a farmer. today Ping Ping taught me to make soap! tea tea tea, snacks, and bicycling. it is all a hazy crazy wonderful whirlwind right now... and it all started with a little place called deep mountain.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
35 days
Megan in the Deep Mountain:
Today is Wednesday for two more minutes. On Sunday I will call the phone number of the farmer's sister that Megan wrote on a scrap of paper.
She left on Sunday morning for Nantou. Nantou is a rural mountainous agricultural area in the center of Taiwan. All she knew was that she had to meet Farmer Chang at the train station at 5pm. I'm picturing a wooden cart drawn by two white oxen. She didn't know how long she'd be staying. Or exactly where. Or what she'd be doing when she got there. I told her if I didn't get word from her in a week I would call. If I don't touch base with her in a week and a day, then I'm calling in the Airforce. I'm sure she is doing fine.
Ashley and Ingrid, A Love Story:
Ashley went into Ingrid's school, Harmony School, on Monday and broke the news. "I was offered full time work, 27 hours, in Hsinfong". Ingrid turned white. "please stay. I will give you 27 hours". "How?" "I will fire the other white guy teacher." "OK" "Here is a contract...and my heart". That is not actually what happened but it was something like that. Ingrid fired the other teacher. Ashley is staying with her.
Besides the young kids that Ashley teaches at Harmony, she has also picked up an adult class on Monday nights. Ashley brings in a copy of the China Post (an English language publication) and they pick an article to read and discuss. Oh, look! There's a China Post on the coffee table. Let's see what the issues are of concern to the English speaking expat population in Taiwan.
THIEF TAKES 11 CASES OF BEER IN JUST TWO TRIPS -Baton Rouge, La
DOG JUMPS ON SLIDING DOOR TO ALERT FAMILY TO FIRE- Beltsville, Md
TSUNAMI WARNING SYSTEM TESTED- Bankok
MISSING LINK PTEROSAUR FOUND IN CHINA- Paris
Oh, here's a good one: "PepsiCo has apologized for a free iPhone application crafted to help men seduce women and keep records of conquests but the program remained available on Tuesday".
This class is small. There are only three adult students. One of them is Ingrid.
Teaching as Improv:
I don't have much time to prepare classes. Sometimes only ten minutes. Today I had to go from one school to another in 40 minutes. I got on the wrong bus. I had to get off the bus. I got on another bus. Turns out the first bus I was on was the right bus. I got back on that bus. I had to run along the river dodging in and out of food stalls, jumping over stools, knocking into tables, and I made it to class with 6 minutes to spare. Class was a disaster but the kids never knew it. I made them play a game on the board while I figured out the lesson plan. Neither my previous teaching experience nor my education prepared me for this job as much as my training as an actor. I keep having flashbacks to Improv exercises I did with the acting troupe I was in as a kid. Most of my job is just cold script reading. The books and materials that the school supplies are mostly patterns the children have to memorize. "I am smart. I am not smart. The fat rabbits are on the desk. I like the fat rabbits". I'm a pretty inefficient teacher. Kids look at me cockeyed a lot. They freak out when I speak Chinese (which I only do under my breath, outside of class time), but I like to speak to them because they seem to understand me more than adults do.
Sanshia is Bensonhurst:
The pedestrian bridge which crosses the river is wide. It is not only for traffic but also for lingering. Loitering is encouraged. there are gazebo/pagoda structures fastened to either side ofthe bridge. It is well lit and lovely.
The other night as I walked across the pedestrian bridge, I saw lovers cooing in a corner, I saw teens smoking in a group off to oneside and I saw old men playing a game in the middle of the bridge. At first I thought it was Baci ball because of the underhand tossing motion and the men facing eachother at a distance of about 20 feet. As I got closer I realized that it was not a ball in their hands but a spinning top. In between them was a little wooden stand with small saucer shaped trays on top. Each man took a turn tossing his top onto the saucer. with in the sacucer was a smaller mark that they aimed for. It looked as if two men at a time play while others look on, chit chat and spit betelnut juice. Spinning tops are not for children in opposite land.
My first archaeological field work was in Bensonhurst Brooklyn. 20 of us college kids would make the trek to 86th Street and dig in the old Dutch church yard as the summer sun nuked us. At noon, our shackles were loosened for an hour. We were free to wander and find food. The people of Bensonhurst were friendly, but warry. I remember one time I went to use a payphone and a smiling man came up to me from out of nowhere to let me know that maybe I should not try to make a call. He was very nice about it though. As we were digging I had a feeling were being watched all the time. Like people were sweating lest we disinter something that should not have been disturbed. Like a body. And of course everyone in Bensonhurst is in the Mafia. I think Sanshia is full of gangsters. I don't have any proof yet bu it feels just like that remote part of Brooklyn. When Ashley and I were kidnapped by the Taiwanese brother and sister last week, we found that they did not want to talk about their jobs. I will have plenty of time to find out more about the character of the town. I picked out an apartment tonight. It is a bathroom, and a room with a bed and a desk. Tomorrow I sign stuff. Sunday I move in if all goes well.
Today is Wednesday for two more minutes. On Sunday I will call the phone number of the farmer's sister that Megan wrote on a scrap of paper.
She left on Sunday morning for Nantou. Nantou is a rural mountainous agricultural area in the center of Taiwan. All she knew was that she had to meet Farmer Chang at the train station at 5pm. I'm picturing a wooden cart drawn by two white oxen. She didn't know how long she'd be staying. Or exactly where. Or what she'd be doing when she got there. I told her if I didn't get word from her in a week I would call. If I don't touch base with her in a week and a day, then I'm calling in the Airforce. I'm sure she is doing fine.
Ashley and Ingrid, A Love Story:
Ashley went into Ingrid's school, Harmony School, on Monday and broke the news. "I was offered full time work, 27 hours, in Hsinfong". Ingrid turned white. "please stay. I will give you 27 hours". "How?" "I will fire the other white guy teacher." "OK" "Here is a contract...and my heart". That is not actually what happened but it was something like that. Ingrid fired the other teacher. Ashley is staying with her.
Besides the young kids that Ashley teaches at Harmony, she has also picked up an adult class on Monday nights. Ashley brings in a copy of the China Post (an English language publication) and they pick an article to read and discuss. Oh, look! There's a China Post on the coffee table. Let's see what the issues are of concern to the English speaking expat population in Taiwan.
THIEF TAKES 11 CASES OF BEER IN JUST TWO TRIPS -Baton Rouge, La
DOG JUMPS ON SLIDING DOOR TO ALERT FAMILY TO FIRE- Beltsville, Md
TSUNAMI WARNING SYSTEM TESTED- Bankok
MISSING LINK PTEROSAUR FOUND IN CHINA- Paris
Oh, here's a good one: "PepsiCo has apologized for a free iPhone application crafted to help men seduce women and keep records of conquests but the program remained available on Tuesday".
This class is small. There are only three adult students. One of them is Ingrid.
Teaching as Improv:
I don't have much time to prepare classes. Sometimes only ten minutes. Today I had to go from one school to another in 40 minutes. I got on the wrong bus. I had to get off the bus. I got on another bus. Turns out the first bus I was on was the right bus. I got back on that bus. I had to run along the river dodging in and out of food stalls, jumping over stools, knocking into tables, and I made it to class with 6 minutes to spare. Class was a disaster but the kids never knew it. I made them play a game on the board while I figured out the lesson plan. Neither my previous teaching experience nor my education prepared me for this job as much as my training as an actor. I keep having flashbacks to Improv exercises I did with the acting troupe I was in as a kid. Most of my job is just cold script reading. The books and materials that the school supplies are mostly patterns the children have to memorize. "I am smart. I am not smart. The fat rabbits are on the desk. I like the fat rabbits". I'm a pretty inefficient teacher. Kids look at me cockeyed a lot. They freak out when I speak Chinese (which I only do under my breath, outside of class time), but I like to speak to them because they seem to understand me more than adults do.
Sanshia is Bensonhurst:
The pedestrian bridge which crosses the river is wide. It is not only for traffic but also for lingering. Loitering is encouraged. there are gazebo/pagoda structures fastened to either side ofthe bridge. It is well lit and lovely.
The other night as I walked across the pedestrian bridge, I saw lovers cooing in a corner, I saw teens smoking in a group off to oneside and I saw old men playing a game in the middle of the bridge. At first I thought it was Baci ball because of the underhand tossing motion and the men facing eachother at a distance of about 20 feet. As I got closer I realized that it was not a ball in their hands but a spinning top. In between them was a little wooden stand with small saucer shaped trays on top. Each man took a turn tossing his top onto the saucer. with in the sacucer was a smaller mark that they aimed for. It looked as if two men at a time play while others look on, chit chat and spit betelnut juice. Spinning tops are not for children in opposite land.
My first archaeological field work was in Bensonhurst Brooklyn. 20 of us college kids would make the trek to 86th Street and dig in the old Dutch church yard as the summer sun nuked us. At noon, our shackles were loosened for an hour. We were free to wander and find food. The people of Bensonhurst were friendly, but warry. I remember one time I went to use a payphone and a smiling man came up to me from out of nowhere to let me know that maybe I should not try to make a call. He was very nice about it though. As we were digging I had a feeling were being watched all the time. Like people were sweating lest we disinter something that should not have been disturbed. Like a body. And of course everyone in Bensonhurst is in the Mafia. I think Sanshia is full of gangsters. I don't have any proof yet bu it feels just like that remote part of Brooklyn. When Ashley and I were kidnapped by the Taiwanese brother and sister last week, we found that they did not want to talk about their jobs. I will have plenty of time to find out more about the character of the town. I picked out an apartment tonight. It is a bathroom, and a room with a bed and a desk. Tomorrow I sign stuff. Sunday I move in if all goes well.
Monday, October 19, 2009
"Green Johnny", "Escape Plan" and Other Tales
Green Johnny
Once there was a man who was born in Nigeria. He fell in love with a woman from Ghana and moved with her to that country. There they had sons. Their sons grew strong, swimming in the river, eating fresh delicious fruits, and wonderful meals of boiled fish and vegetables. One day, the youngest son, Johnny, took leave of his family. "I'm going to Taiwan," he said, "to teach English."
Johnny got on a plane. He came to Taiwan. He started looking for work at the English schools. The people in the schools would always tell him that he was not what they wanted. People who met Johnny on the street or in a cafe would always ask him "why are you here?...are you working?...do you drive a cab?....do you sell knockoff shoes?... Are you a laborer?" but no one ever guessed that he was there to teach.
One day, a school that Johnny sent his resume to called him up. The man on the phone said "are you black or white?" "I am green" said Johnny. "You are green!?!" "Yes, I am green. A group of us green people came over here together. There are three of us in Taipei now and two went to the south. We have green skin." "OK, you come in tomorrow for the interview." "I will be there at 1 o'clock." At 1 o'clock, Johnny showed up to the school. As he walked up to the glass doors he could see all of the secretaries looking over the tops of their cubicles to see the green man. He could hear them whispering "is that him?" Johnny opened the door and said, "I am Green". The manager ushered him into his office, looked at him and said "you are not green". Johnny said "that is because you can not see me. With my eyes, I look at my skin and it is green, my hands are green. my arms are green. my legs are green. You are wearing glasses so you can not see me with your natural eyes. Take of your glasses off and you will see that I am green". "If I take off my glasses then I cannot see you at all", said the manager. "That then is your problem. If you fix your eyes then you will see".
Johnny got the job teaching. He has been in Taiwan for over 10 years. He works sporadically for that first school that hired him and where they still call him "Green Johnny". Johnny now also has a fairly lucrative scooter parts export business. Johnny procures scooter parts from all over the island and ships them to his brother in Africa where they are then put into custom scooters and sold.
Escape Plan
Derek is a Canadian who showed up at the hostel with his boyfriend a few days ago. He is working for Hess the same company that I work for. His branch is in Taipei City and is exclusively kindergarten. Derek didn't know that it is illegal for foreigners to teach kindergarten in Taiwan. Yesterday he was given a tour of the school. There are three class rooms. In each one he was told where the emergency exit was and given an elaborate escape route up to the roof, then over to the roof of the neighboring building, then down that building's elevator and onto to street. If at any point when he is in the building "the song about the purple monkeys swinging free" is played on the loudspeaker, then he is immediately to grab his belongings and escape.
Today I went into work. My locker was gone. All of the lockers were gone. "Curious", I thought. I needed to find my locker because in it were my lesson plans.
I asked one of the girls who answers the phone where they were and she said they were moved into the classrooms. "OK". I turned to go through the door to the classrooms but there was no longer a door there. Where the door used to be was now a wall. We got inspected today. I guess my school has fake walls. No one every told me about any escape plans or purple monkey songs. Maybe they have a trap door in front of the chalkboard that will shoot me out to safety.
Contract
A week ago I went to RenAi hospital to have my health check done. A health check is required for all foreign workers. I went in and took a number and filled out a form. They called it and sent me to window 11. That is the cashier for foreigners. I confused the woman at the window who was entering my data into the computer by putting down my name as Helen C.M. Jackson. I didn't know what the trouble was. Middle names. As it is, my name was too long anyway. In Taiwan I am now Helen Jackso. I then was sent into a room and where there was a long counter with swivel chairs at regular intervals like an old Woolworth's dining counter. In front of each chair was a number1 2 3 ...There was a different woman stationed opposite each station. First I was weighed and my height taken. I'm 177 cm. 54kg. At station two my blood pressure was taken. switching seats my eyes examined. Then i was sent upstairs and sat in front of a similar set up with the phlebotomists. first chair-handed the woman my file. she gave me three empty vials to take to the next chair where a woman filled them up with my blood. Then into the x-ray. "take off your necklace" the man indicated. I could not. I am wearing a Joan of Arc medal tied around my neck with thread. He put it in my mouth. had me wrap my arms around a big metal box. snapped a picture of my chest and in thirty seconds I was on my way home.
The entire process took under an hour.
Friday I had to go back and pick up my papers. I was sure I'd have a clean bill of health. I was wrong. I needed a measles/rubella vaccination.
Now, if any of the Plagges are reading this, Angela, I swear there was a Taiwanese candystriper who was an Asian version of your mother. I almost said xiexie Mrs. George to her at one point. She guided me from counter to counter paying, picking up the vaccine and and showing me to the door where they would stick me with it. She was very good.
After picking up the paperwork I took it to the Hess office. There I signed "the government" contract. It struck me as odd that the Hess name appeared no where on the paper.
Tomorrow or Wednesday I will sign "the Hess contract" in Sanshia.
I'm contracted till August 15. It is a little shorter than a year but that is because I'm filling the space which was vacated by some English guy who took off in the night.
Teaching is going to be strange. I have 11 classes now and by December I will have 13. I will be in or around the offices from 9 til 9. I was grading papers last week. I was doing it wrong. I am not permitted to give a grade lower than 85.
I'm teaching many different ages and abilities. One class I was teaching verb tenses to kids that don't know what a verb is.
How do you explain a noun to someone who hasn't had "person, place, or thing" as a vocabulary word yet?
Teacher Rebecca was sick last night so I covered her honors class. The subject was places of worship.
That's a funny story. Maybe I'll tell it later.
h
Once there was a man who was born in Nigeria. He fell in love with a woman from Ghana and moved with her to that country. There they had sons. Their sons grew strong, swimming in the river, eating fresh delicious fruits, and wonderful meals of boiled fish and vegetables. One day, the youngest son, Johnny, took leave of his family. "I'm going to Taiwan," he said, "to teach English."
Johnny got on a plane. He came to Taiwan. He started looking for work at the English schools. The people in the schools would always tell him that he was not what they wanted. People who met Johnny on the street or in a cafe would always ask him "why are you here?...are you working?...do you drive a cab?....do you sell knockoff shoes?... Are you a laborer?" but no one ever guessed that he was there to teach.
One day, a school that Johnny sent his resume to called him up. The man on the phone said "are you black or white?" "I am green" said Johnny. "You are green!?!" "Yes, I am green. A group of us green people came over here together. There are three of us in Taipei now and two went to the south. We have green skin." "OK, you come in tomorrow for the interview." "I will be there at 1 o'clock." At 1 o'clock, Johnny showed up to the school. As he walked up to the glass doors he could see all of the secretaries looking over the tops of their cubicles to see the green man. He could hear them whispering "is that him?" Johnny opened the door and said, "I am Green". The manager ushered him into his office, looked at him and said "you are not green". Johnny said "that is because you can not see me. With my eyes, I look at my skin and it is green, my hands are green. my arms are green. my legs are green. You are wearing glasses so you can not see me with your natural eyes. Take of your glasses off and you will see that I am green". "If I take off my glasses then I cannot see you at all", said the manager. "That then is your problem. If you fix your eyes then you will see".
Johnny got the job teaching. He has been in Taiwan for over 10 years. He works sporadically for that first school that hired him and where they still call him "Green Johnny". Johnny now also has a fairly lucrative scooter parts export business. Johnny procures scooter parts from all over the island and ships them to his brother in Africa where they are then put into custom scooters and sold.
Escape Plan
Derek is a Canadian who showed up at the hostel with his boyfriend a few days ago. He is working for Hess the same company that I work for. His branch is in Taipei City and is exclusively kindergarten. Derek didn't know that it is illegal for foreigners to teach kindergarten in Taiwan. Yesterday he was given a tour of the school. There are three class rooms. In each one he was told where the emergency exit was and given an elaborate escape route up to the roof, then over to the roof of the neighboring building, then down that building's elevator and onto to street. If at any point when he is in the building "the song about the purple monkeys swinging free" is played on the loudspeaker, then he is immediately to grab his belongings and escape.
Today I went into work. My locker was gone. All of the lockers were gone. "Curious", I thought. I needed to find my locker because in it were my lesson plans.
I asked one of the girls who answers the phone where they were and she said they were moved into the classrooms. "OK". I turned to go through the door to the classrooms but there was no longer a door there. Where the door used to be was now a wall. We got inspected today. I guess my school has fake walls. No one every told me about any escape plans or purple monkey songs. Maybe they have a trap door in front of the chalkboard that will shoot me out to safety.
Contract
A week ago I went to RenAi hospital to have my health check done. A health check is required for all foreign workers. I went in and took a number and filled out a form. They called it and sent me to window 11. That is the cashier for foreigners. I confused the woman at the window who was entering my data into the computer by putting down my name as Helen C.M. Jackson. I didn't know what the trouble was. Middle names. As it is, my name was too long anyway. In Taiwan I am now Helen Jackso. I then was sent into a room and where there was a long counter with swivel chairs at regular intervals like an old Woolworth's dining counter. In front of each chair was a number1 2 3 ...There was a different woman stationed opposite each station. First I was weighed and my height taken. I'm 177 cm. 54kg. At station two my blood pressure was taken. switching seats my eyes examined. Then i was sent upstairs and sat in front of a similar set up with the phlebotomists. first chair-handed the woman my file. she gave me three empty vials to take to the next chair where a woman filled them up with my blood. Then into the x-ray. "take off your necklace" the man indicated. I could not. I am wearing a Joan of Arc medal tied around my neck with thread. He put it in my mouth. had me wrap my arms around a big metal box. snapped a picture of my chest and in thirty seconds I was on my way home.
The entire process took under an hour.
Friday I had to go back and pick up my papers. I was sure I'd have a clean bill of health. I was wrong. I needed a measles/rubella vaccination.
Now, if any of the Plagges are reading this, Angela, I swear there was a Taiwanese candystriper who was an Asian version of your mother. I almost said xiexie Mrs. George to her at one point. She guided me from counter to counter paying, picking up the vaccine and and showing me to the door where they would stick me with it. She was very good.
After picking up the paperwork I took it to the Hess office. There I signed "the government" contract. It struck me as odd that the Hess name appeared no where on the paper.
Tomorrow or Wednesday I will sign "the Hess contract" in Sanshia.
I'm contracted till August 15. It is a little shorter than a year but that is because I'm filling the space which was vacated by some English guy who took off in the night.
Teaching is going to be strange. I have 11 classes now and by December I will have 13. I will be in or around the offices from 9 til 9. I was grading papers last week. I was doing it wrong. I am not permitted to give a grade lower than 85.
I'm teaching many different ages and abilities. One class I was teaching verb tenses to kids that don't know what a verb is.
How do you explain a noun to someone who hasn't had "person, place, or thing" as a vocabulary word yet?
Teacher Rebecca was sick last night so I covered her honors class. The subject was places of worship.
That's a funny story. Maybe I'll tell it later.
h
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